Why victimizing yourself is also a form of running away from your painful thoughts

The mind’s natural tendency is to either run away or fight.

When I sit with my thoughts, the most painful thought appears first. I now have 2 choices. Run or fight. Running could be in the form of distractions. Distractions could be in the form of victimizing myself.

I have a friend. When she sits with her thoughts, and a painful thought comes along, she does something unusual. Her mind immediately runs away from the pain and starts looking for someone to blame. Obviously, she can’t find anyone else to blame but herself. This brings her pain. She runs away from that new thought, and starts looking for “proof” to blame someone else. Whether she finds someone else to blame, or ends up blaming herself, her system collapses.

In the times that her system doesn’t collapse, she manages to put enough effort to distract herself completely with external means; email, blogs, chatting, Facebook, etc.

If my friend can make enough effort to stand and fight -considering she can face the painful thought- she would prevent collapse and cure the problem from its source. Her mind’s natural tendency -seeing that it has no choice but to fight- stars immediately resolving the problem behind the painful thought.

Make use of your mind’s natural problem-solving tendency. It all starts with standing and fighting.

Yours,
Will

Twitter: @williamchoukeir

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