“keep the curtain up at all costs.”
_michel gerber in his book the e-myth revisited.
I was talking to a close friend one evening about his relationship with his girlfriend. and I asked him how transparent his relationship is. ‘pretty transparent.’ he answered. transparent isn’t good enough I said. you have to keep the curtain up at all costs for the relationship to work.
the difference between being transparent and keeping the curtains up is the time aspect of it. intervals VS always on.
in any relationship, not just in a couple, things happen individually, with each person, then they share sometime later. most of the time after the point of no return has passed. this is being transparent. there’s a certain delay.
take a theater play as example. a scene happens, then the curtains close. things happen behind the curtains. then the curtains open and show you what happened, the end result. never the process. this is close to what being transparent is. keeping the curtain up is a whole different ball game.
the curtains never close. the audience is aware all the time what’s happening. there’s no surprise after the curtains open. and this same idea applies to relationships. everyone involved in this relationship is aware of the whole process as things evolve and change. when the point of no return happens, everybody is already aware and ok with it.
hanane is my partner in life. and this is what we practice together. I share with her my thoughts as they happen. I share with her the process, not just the end result. this way I never have to show her the results and explain myself. she knows. she understands. there are no drastic changes. only a constant process of subtle changes.
we all change. and out of respect for everyone involved with us, we owe it to them to involve them in the process. and because I respect the whole world, and because I could be involved with anyone of you at any time, I choose to keep anyone who chooses involved in my process and evolution. I choose to keep the curtain up for the whole world. at all costs.
remember, if you care about any of your relationships, don’t open the curtains up at different intervals in time. keep it open all the time. see you all back here on Tomorrow, Tuesday 14 December, 2010 (the notes are now live). that’s when the curtains open opened up for good.
p.s. please bug me and hold me to my words if I ever close the curtains. love you all.